Sometimes, what energizes us is more. More activities! More friends! More work!
Other times, we need to slow down.
Here are seven ways to simplify and slow down:
1. Be Here Now
Be here now, not in the future, not in the past. This sounds simple but is not always easy to achieve.
Some years ago, after reading The Power Of Now by Eckhart Tolle, I realized I was not living in the now. In my thoughts, I was always somewhere else, even when I was doing things I wanted to do. When I was working I was thinking about what to do after work. When I was “relaxing”, I was thinking about all the things I instead needed to do and places I instead needed to be. This was not relaxing.
Being in the now was surprisingly difficult in the beginning but I got better. I started noticing my wondering thoughts and started bringing them back to the present. I started noticing small moments like a bumblebee collecting pollen (fascinating!) and allowing myself to enjoy these moments.
At home, we can slow down our pace. We can elevate small, everyday moments to make them more special by lighting a candle, taking a moment before eating, or making things beautiful like setting the table for yourself like you would when you’d have company over.
2. Own Less To Live More
Less stuff means less to clean, less to maintain, less to pick up, and less stress.
How much time and energy do you currently give to your possessions?
What would you rather do with that time?
Let’s not give our precious time to stuff we don’t even want in our lives. I personally could not have imagined beforehand how much time and energy (physical and mental) can be saved by letting go of stuff. You have to experience it to know it.
3. Find Joy In Chores
Of course, even if we own less, we can’t avoid all household tasks so we might as well enjoy them. Don't rush from one task to another, let them take the time they require. Find joy in maintaining your home.
Mopping the floors or folding the laundry can be viewed as a type of meditation, elevating it from a chore to a moment of zen. But only if the floors are free of stuff and there is only one laundry basket of folding to do.
If you share your home with others, of course, let them in on the fun, too! According to child development experts, when children view household tasks as pleasurable, they will naturally want to do them.
And of course, if you are in a busy season of life, outsource what you can. It takes a village. But do take a moment to examine, is all the busyness necessary?
4. Simple, Slow Food
When it comes to cooking, don’t feel like you have to reinvent the wheel every day. Cook what your family likes! Proudly pull out one of your trusted recipes on weeknights, and be happy that everyone is fed. Home cooking doesn't have to be complicated. You can make tasty meals with less than ten ingredients.
Try to enjoy the process rather than rush it. Try listening to an audiobook while chopping vegetables. Or invite kids to chop vegetables with you and share stories about their days while you prepare the meal together.
Rotating menus makes grocery shopping simple too as you keep buying the same groceries. This also minimizes the clutter in the pantry and the fridge. The same can be done with other household consumables like toilet paper, soap, cleaning products, etc. Once you find a product you like stick with it.
Find value in deciding once. Decide once what you eat for breakfast, lunch, or dinner on Fridays. Decide once what times of day you eat and decide once what you won’t eat. Days flow more smoothly when you're not making these types of decisions every day, multiple times a day.
And once you do sit down to eat your meal or drink a cup of tea, savor it. Put your phone away and enjoy it, whether you're alone or with others.
5. Simple Wardrobes For Slower Pace Of Life
Simplifying the closet will save time so you can slow down.
It will save time in the mornings when you’re thinking about what to wear. It will save time when you’re doing laundry. It will save you time when it's time to shop for clothes.
Consider having a capsule wardrobe, a small collection of clothes that all works together. Typically, we all have some colors and styles that work for us better than others.
Pay attention to materials and washing instructions. Don’t buy clothes that require special attention if you’re not willing to give them that extra time or if you’d rather use that time doing something more enjoyable.
For my children, I follow these same principles. Knowing what colors they like, I try to stick with colors that coordinate well together so that their clothing matches somewhat nicely without any extra effort. It also means there’s a maximum amount of possible outfits when everything works together.
And just like with buying groceries and other household consumables I like to stick with the same brands that I know and like, especially with kids' clothing.
“You’ll see I wear only gray or blue suits. I’m trying to pare down decisions. I don’t want to make decisions about what I’m eating or wearing. Because I have too many other decisions to make.”
Even if you're not the president, you can still benefit from simplifying and leaving room for relaxation.
6. Schedule Slow
Learn to say no. You don't have to explain yourself, a polite no thank you is enough. Sometimes you may even need to say no to things you'd really enjoy doing. Saying no means saying yes to something else, and vice versa.
Don’t overcrowd your days. Maybe there technically are enough hours in the day to do x, y, and z but if you or your family members don't want to rush from one activity to another then don't. Leave room for the magical moments that happen unscheduled. Children benefit from boredom, and so do we.
Schedule breaks. And when you do, leave the phone and get some fresh air. Even short breaks will energize if done correctly.
7. Slow Down Free Time
On average, Americans have about 34-40 hours of free time per week (women have 4.9 hours per day, and men 5.7 hours per day). Over half of all that leisure time is used watching TV.
How we spend our free time matters. Good leisure time:
Leaves you with a story;
Forces you to grow or gives you purpose;
Is unplugged;
Improves relationships; or
Includes moments of awe.
Consider how you’d like to spend your precious moments. If you say you’d like to spend more time with friends and family, travel, paint, meditate, volunteer, build a business or whatever it is, make it a priority or it won’t happen. Minutes become hours, hours become days, and days become years. Turn off the screen and go do what you want to do.
When you do consume media, carefully consider what you watch, read, or listen to. Be intentional and cut out everything that doesn’t make your life better.
Interior shows might be fun to watch but they might also make you feel like your own home is never good enough. Spend that 30 minutes tidying or cleaning your own home and it will be closer to how you’d like it to be.
Reading women’s magazines or browsing social media might seem like a relaxing way to spend a few minutes here and there but it might also make you feel like you’re not good enough. Track how much time you actually spend online. Do you want to spend that time scrolling? Consider instead spending that time going for a walk, calling a friend, or meditating and you will be closer to who you want to become.
Contemplate how you want to spend your life and compare that to how you currently spend your days, hours, and minutes. Make changes, even if they are small, to be closer to your ideal lifestyle.
Slow down your breath and your presence. Slow down for small moments in life.
Be intentional with your days.
Because what's the rush? Getting through life as quickly and effectively as possible? No.
So slow down to enjoy life, every bit of it.
This blog post was inspired by:
Carl Honoré's book In Praise of Slowness and the accompanying TED Talk
Brooke McAlary's book Slow: Simple Living for a Frantic World